In any field of study or even in your career, a workshop, seminar, or short course is encouraged because the outcome is truly one of enrichment. Why then would we treat our marriage any differently?
On Sunday, September 27, Catholic Engaged Encounter of Trinidad and Tobago (CEETT) held a reunion and collaborated with key stakeholders such as the Archdiocesan Family Life Commission (AFLC) and priests within the Archdiocese, and what an incredible experience it was. For some context, this group is an amazing blueprint not only for engaged couples but also for those in committed relationships. The wealth of information they offer supports people who want to conduct a ‘health check’ on their relationship and reflect on what the next step in their journey looks like.

Whether you have been married for 28 days or 28 years, every couple has a unique experience. The environment was light, honest and welcoming, creating a safe space to hear and share the vulnerabilities that exist within marriage. This forum gave participants the opportunity to conduct what I would call a performance appraisal—as husband and wife.As with any assessment, you need a plan. A plan for what comes next and how you will continue to nurture and support the success of the Sacrament of Marriage.

One of the narratives that really resonated with me was the Trinity in marriage: you, your spouse and God. As one facilitator shared, your husband or wife is helping you get to Heaven. Wait? What? Let’s take a moment to really ponder that. Imagine that the person you married is helping to shape you—not just teaching you how to love but also teaching you self-control, peace, kindness, and perhaps more importantly, patience!
We also explored what I would call a ‘knee-jerking technique’ (Daily Check-In) for marriage and by knee-jerking, I mean literally facing your spouse with your knees touching, checking in with one another using thought-provoking questions and closing the conversation by praying for each other.

Then came what I would describe as a marriage audit, centred around three critical questions: How do we respect each other’s differences and see those differences as gifts? How are we demonstrating that we are equal? How are we living and operating as one?

Trust me when I say I was very happy this wasn’t a pass-or-fail situation because in my eyes, we passed with flying colours simply by showing up, being vulnerable, and recognising that a wedding is a day, but a marriage is a lifetime. We live in a changing world where experiences and what is accessible to us are becoming increasingly dynamic. Yes, I am referring to AI and the growing need to discern what is real and what is fake. Yet, in the midst of all of this change, let us continue to remember the foundation upon which the Sacrament of Marriage is built. Just like anything worth building, a marriage requires prayer, maintenance, intentionality and yes, the occasional refresher. Here’s to continuing to learn, grow, love, and choose each other-again and again. – Kandice Britton-Samuel, CEETT volunteer.